To start, because it is awesome & goes unrecorded all too often. Collin serenaded us with, "I like green beans and I cannot lie!" last night at the family dinner table. Happens a million times a day. I am dumbfounded at how funny & weird my kid is. It is really the only way I am making it through these long February days.
Speaking of dinner. We were spending almost $1000 a month to feed ourselves. Say what, now? Cah-ra-zee. I have worked to get it back to $800. Still a long way from the $400 we could get by with in Idaho, though.
Lentils were becoming my best friend because they are so darn nutritious & cheap. Not a very common occurrence. Then the stomach bug of 2012 hit. Blech! Not wanting to consume another lentil anytime soon, if you catch my drift. Also, I am not recommending it, but I did lose all my holiday weight with the stomach flu diet. (silver lining?)
I feel like we are slowly waking up from a hibernation. I think we all go out with a bang at Christmas time. Before tucking away for the winter. Then the end of February hits. You are still half asleep but you have to go to the bathroom & that terrible morning taste has formed in your mouth. (sorry Feb., but it is true)
I have been blocked a bit when it comes to the blog. Blogging about anything that matters is a place of vulnerability. It is to me, like that naked public speaking dream. I am only in this blog world for the feedback, even if it will just be my own in 2060, reflecting on what a full life we lived. Serving as a baby book of sorts. But for the day to day, it has not really scratched the validation itch.
And maybe that is a good thing. A great thing, really. Because I need to stretch & grow & not be such a darn people pleaser. On the blog & in real life.
So here goes the vulnerability part. I really want a baby. Not a child. A baby. I know what to do with a baby. A preteen? Yea, I have not quite got that figured out. The thing is, all the "somedays" are happening right now. Someday we will be tee-ball parents, someday we will play tooth fairy, someday they will know all the words to "Baby Got Back." (just kidding) All these hopes & dreams are coming true. It is so satisfying & rich, but also SO SAD. I did not really dream a dream past 10 years old. And now that we are there, I am just so exhausted.
So.... add a baby to this over-priced, diarrheal, seasonally affected bunch... right???!!!
That's where I am. The baby is turning 4 and I'm not ready to give up this gig that I L O V E... good luck! I mean, it's crazy right? Why does procreating get left up to Moms who have already lost their minds? Yet here we are...
ReplyDeleteJayna! You said it better than I did! Also, your nephews naked antics made me feel so much better this week ;)
ReplyDeleteI love reading your posts all the time, but ones like these are my favorite- where you open up a bit more than usual and bare all. I often feel the same way about the blog, and need to work on the whole people pleasing part myself.
ReplyDeleteHere's my honesty: I'm not sure I'm ready for a baby. Seven weeks doesn't seem long enough. Isn't that horrible to think/say? Oh Well...that's my honesty, without trying to please. :)
Oh, and you're not old yet- so why not have just ONE more. ;)
No! Megan that does not sound bad AT ALL! I was hoping to hear about some of your pregnancy this go 'round.
ReplyDeleteYes, I am trying to get one more out of Matt. He only wanted 2 so I may be pushing it...oh, and he would have to reverse a very painful surgery :/
I love reading your posts like this too...although this is the first mention of another baby, right?? I say go for it, but you're scaring me because you guys are in my role model category of "people who have 4 kids" when we entertain the thought of a 4th. But hey- another handsome Archuleta boy...or DARE I SAY IT...a gorgeous girl?? I vote yes. Good luck with those tiny little details you just listed. Ha ha.
ReplyDeleteAlycia! I cannot believe, with your last few years, you guys entertain even the thought of a 4th! Ha! You are made of steel, girl!!!
ReplyDeleteHa!! Steel!! I like it. I think we are still delirious and cannot be expected to make major life decisions for another year...if ever.
ReplyDelete